My soul is halfway out the door but I still have 11 more days to get through/enjoy my time here in Whistler. I honestly can’t believe this time has finally come. It feels like I have been waiting for it for awhile and in truth I have been. I have been in a waiting period and it feels like it has been an especially long one with lots of lessons and deep inner work. I am still trying to navigate my way through it towards the end. I am glad I stuck it out though because there were times when I wanted to jump ship and get the fuck out because it was too hard. But the Universe does acknowledge that I stuck around for that extra much needed work. And I’m still doing the work.
In all honesty, I thought I would be leaving Whistler sober. I went on an adventure into the world of sobriety and abstaining from alcohol. It was tough at first and then I came to realize that I am not powerless over alcohol and that is empowering on its own. That being said, I still choose to have it in my life and I’m exploring why. I know that in the last couple months I let myself enjoy beautiful bc cider and wine and it has been delicious and nurturing at both a superficial and a deeper level. We do what we do to get by and I realize that it has been a huge coping mechanism in my life and it has served its purpose. All things must and do come to an end to continue the circle of life, so while my time in Whistler is coming to an end, so again is my relationship with alcohol. I’m glad I allowed myself to venture there again with it and not let the fear of ever touching it again rule my life. In the last couple months, I have had some incredible times and connected with some incredible people truly uniquely with the accompany of alcohol. Not to say that I wouldn’t have had these connections/experiences without it, but it may have been different and so for that reason I have no regrets. I met an angel here on this earth and realized his angelic nature during our late night wine chats where we opened up to each other about life and why we chose to be here in these bodies and in this time.
The spirit of alcohol has given me the feeling of freedom in my being and freedom of expression when I would have otherwise been recluse. But now…or very soon I am about to let go of all things, ideas, constraints, limitations bit by bit as I embrace true freedom on a journey back to my true self. I am ultimately learning to let go of all things until I only give a fuck about 3 things….Peace, Love and Freedom. I am learning to play with the darkness instead of drowning in it or ignoring it. I am learning to not fear the things we were taught to fear. I am learning to love the things I never intended to. I am learning to let go and trust in the plan that the Universe has in store for me and this Earth. Hang in there and enjoy the journey beautiful:) Cheers to that!!!